"This is the weakest weapon in IKEA"

[avram]

Ikea considered as a video game:

As you enter the SHOWROOM, perform a rolling dodge to the left. Grab a free PAPER TAPE MEASURE and a handful of IKEA EMBLAZONED GOLF PENCILS from the kiosk near the entryway. The PENCILS serve quite well as ranged weapons, but it will take some time to master their use. Before venturing further in the world, stand at the kiosk and practice hurling GOLF PENCILS at patrons as they enter the SHOWROOM. Remember: Hitting the eyes does triple damage.

Comments

[bibliotrope.livejournal.com]

And here I thought the only danger the IKEA golf pencils ever posed was to my wallet -- as in writing down stuff I wanted to buy!